Successful Breastfeeding Blog
Evidence based advice, support, and education for modern families.
“Say goodbye to sleep!” I can’t remember how many times I heard this while pregnant with my second baby after a 10 year gap between pregnancies. It was super annoying. Every baby was different, but I also knew a few tricks that had worked really well with my first baby, and I was looking forward to trying them again to see if they worked. We’re 4 weeks into our breastfeeding journey, and my son is a VERY different human from my daughter. She was more laid back. He’s particular. I checked her diaper constantly because she couldn’t care less what went on in there. I hear from him if 5 minutes pass and he hasn’t been changed. Temperature didn’t bother her. If he’s even slightly chilly, the entire house knows about it. But the sleep tricks that worked the first time still worked this time, you can use them too! Welcome to the Successful Breastfeeding Blog!
Check out my other posts and grab your FREE Guide to Picking the BEST Child Care Below! Top 10 Tips for Successful Breastfeeding How to Safely Sleep With Your Baby? Get More Sleep Podcast A common myth is that sleep is worse with a breastfed baby vs. a formula fed baby. Researches have looked closely at this. While it’s true that moms may get fewer hours of sleep since a partner isn’t splitting nighttime feedings, their quality of sleep tends to be better and they report feeling more rested than mothers who formula feed. Babies don’t sleep through the night for many months, sometimes years, no matter what you feed them. But there ARE things you can do to get everyone in the house more rest. I’m not going to tell you to nap when the baby naps, because as a mom myself, I know how unrealistic that is, unless you have a nanny for other kids, a private chef to cook for your family, a maid to clean your house, and a driver to run all your errands for you. *Before you use my hacks for a better night’s sleep, click here to read about safe sleeping arrangements. Did you know that babies aren’t born making melatonin? Melatonin is the sleepytime hormone. You make it naturally as part of your day/night, sleep/wake cycle. Guess what contains melatonin? Your milk! And night milk has more than day milk. Food for thought: Even if your partner got up to give a bottle of YOUR pumped milk from earlier in the day, it’s possible that the different hormone levels could lead to a nighttime baby party, and you’d STILL have to pump to protect your supply. Sounds like a lose-lose. There are some things I’ve found from experience (and research supports as well) that can ACTUALLY help you and your baby find the best routine possible. After my hacks, I'll share with you my exact routine that works like a charm, and allows me the most sleep possible! Sleep hacks, and why they work for most babies.
My particular routine: I start by I dimming the living room lights after dinner and nurse, fold laundry, spend time with my husband, and watch TV. At bedtime, we do a diaper change, swaddling sleep sack, and lights off other than a small night light. I turn on white noise and nurse in a side-lying position in bed, then he comes off the breast and closes his eyes, usually between 10:30 and 11 PM. He sleeps on his back; no rocking, pacifier, or elaborate bedtime ritual. He wakes up between 2-3am to nurse. He does NOT cry to tell me he’s hungry, and 9 times out of 10, I wake up before he even opens his eyes. It’s breastfeeding magic I can’t explain. We nurse side lying, and he goes right back to sleep when he’s done. We repeat the same thing at 5:30ish, and finish when my husband’s alarm goes off. He changes the baby and hands him back to me, and we snooze until 7 when I turn the lights on, the white noise off, and unswaddle him. RARELY is he ready to be fully awake at that time and he naps while I shower. I get out and nurse a wide awake baby at 8 before taking my older daughter to school. Virtual Breastfeeding SupportI hope these help you get better sleep, and build a better nursing relationship with your little one. If you’re struggling or have questions about making a nighttime routine work for you, reach out to one of our experts. A baby who cries non-stop for hours is never normal and needs help! Check in with us and your pediatrician to figure things out. Don’t just assume no sleep for anyone is a normal thing. AuthorHey! I’m Allison, guest poster for Successful Breastfeeding! I am an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) and have over seven years of experience as a pediatric nurse working one on one with mothers and babies. My most important credential is being “Mama” to two little ones.
17 Comments
Veronica
1/23/2020 09:33:52 pm
Hello, I pretty much have been doing the same thing you do but I was wondering until what age is this okay. When does the baby start building trust in sleeping on his own?
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Allison Alexander, LPN, IBCLC
1/27/2020 08:11:47 pm
As long as it works for your family. If it doesn't, it's time to look at his sleep habits and starting to build some independent sleep skills that he'll use his whole life.
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Claudia
5/11/2020 11:10:36 am
Hi, does anyone know why partially bf mom's can't co-sleep? I breastfeed my baby all meals but most days in the morning or evening I find that he needs more and can't find more in my boobs and I end up making him a bottle of formula. I don't know how to make enough and would love to not have to do this. Any further info on co-sleeping in this kind of situation? Thank you so much!
Sherine
1/26/2020 07:02:02 am
Wow ALLISON..😊. Your writing is an inspiration and so true... On the facts that babies need not be sleep trained so young and that it's best to co sleep with ure baby.. Im a mom of three kids within a 10year range. I experienced the difference of co sleeping and crib babies. It's so wonderful and a true bonding exp with your child than going by books n blogs of sleep trainers, docs, relatives etc on various matters. Thanks Allison for also convincing me that I'm not the only mother who breastfeed with no particular sleep schedule
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Madison
1/29/2020 10:48:26 pm
Thank you so much for posting. I’m a new mom and was searching similar articles on Pinterest. I often doubt what I’m doing as a new mom or feel anxious that I’m not “doing” enough or the right thing. After reading this, you made me feel confident and reassured, realizing that our routines are very similar. Thank you.
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Ann
2/3/2020 06:12:06 am
Thanks so much! I’ve been doing the exact same thing and everyone just has an opinion about it, but I do what’s best for our baby: lots of love and close to mom 🥰
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Naomi
2/8/2020 02:39:32 am
Thanks for posting this is gonna help me alot!!And I just noticed we sleep better ...together!Maybe il do the crib later on after 3 months.
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Jessica
3/1/2020 08:44:26 am
Hi, we've mostly been doing this... We could be better with the lights and quiet at night for a quicker result. My question is what about naps during the day? I have a 3yr old homeschooler, and as you know kids in general can be loud. My son ends up taking no longer than 40min. max naps if I'm lucky. He might take longer naps if we're out at story time or running errands as he sleeps in the car seat or carrier. How do I get him to nap for longer periods of time? I feel like he's overtired and extremely fussy so he crys himself to sleep even in my arms and trying to nurse. Would you suggest having him in his room alone during nap time? In dark room or light room? With or without the noise? My daughter was also very different from my son.
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Tanya
4/14/2020 04:50:07 am
I have the exact same issue. I have a four year old at home at the moment and my 2month old only takes 40 minute naps no matter what I try. He sleeps great at night but how can I help him during the day to nap longer?
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Hello, I really liked this post! :) thanks for sharing Your experience. I am really curious how things went on later with your son? I have daughter that us now almost 8 months old. I have been sleeping with her beside me ever since she was born, and in the beginning we had the same situation as you mention in the post. Mosly she would wake only once during the night to breastfeed, and that really was awesome. But now we have a "problem"... She is still sleeping with us, but she wakes up 3 or 4 (sometimes more) times per night to breastfeed, and we are slowly becoming sleep deprived... Do you have some advice about what to do about that? I would never let my baby to cry-it-out so I'm running out of options... :(
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Kaitlyn
3/25/2020 03:16:50 pm
Do you burp in between feeds?
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Ana
3/31/2020 09:10:22 am
Yes, I burp her every time...
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Eesha
4/10/2020 01:10:52 pm
Hi Allison, Your article is so positive about co-sleeping and breastfeeding. I am mother of 5 months old baby girl and I wanted to ask you that my period started immediately after she became 2 months old. That affected my milk supply. So should I take calcium-magnesium supplements (read on Instagram) to increase milk supply? Currently I am pumping every after 2 hours.
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4/15/2020 07:35:32 pm
Hi, so how would you do this if you had twins? I am breastfeeding, bottle breast feeding, pumping and supplementing in formula time to time. My twins were sleeping so well in their pack n play at the foot of our bed, and on a good eating and sleeping schedule coming home from NICU. Now for a few nights and oarts of the day, they are not sleeping well in their pack n play and prefer to be in the twin z pillow. One night they slept in the twin z pillow next to me in bed and we finally were all able to get some rest. Any suggestions will be so helpful! Thanks!
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Melissa
10/14/2020 01:51:30 pm
Im having a hard time adjusting to breastfeeding because I didn't breastfeed my other children, my little girl seems to sleep more during the day than night I feed on demand but she doesn't eat that much during the day
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HK
12/20/2020 10:03:02 am
I was planning on doing juuuuust what you do since I learned I was pregnant, but my baby (3mo) couldn't care less about bed sharing, she does sleep in a co-sleeper crib 20cms from me. Be aware that your article may create unrealistic expectations for some, and a lot of what goes on depends on the baby's character. My babygirl only takes 20(!) minutes naps so I need to babywear the rest of the nap (5/6 times a day) and she doesn't even sleep well in it cause all the noises around disturb her. She also needed to be held for 10min after feeding/burping before putting her down otherwise she'd get gassy and reflux would come up. Because of her dependinhlg heavily on breastfeeding to sleep I had to wean her off it and there was crying involved of course, but I never left ger side and we still sleep face to face at night and I can hold her hand. I still breastfeed on demand just not to sleep. Everyone/baby/family is different.
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Shannon
1/2/2021 02:55:39 pm
So I have an 11 month old who goes to bed perfectly fine at night but wakes up 2 times every night to breast feed. I feel like he should be sleeping through the night without breast feeding still. And he only takes a short nap during the day so I know he’s tired so it doesn’t make any sense and I don’t know what to do.
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![]() I'm Kelly Maher Carvell, Successful Breastfeeding LLC's founder, and lactation expert.
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AuthorKelly Maher, CLC, CLE Categories:All Advice For Your Partner Birth Bottle Feeding Breastfeeding Twins Child Care Co Sleeping Dairy Free Dairy Intolerance Education Latching Milk Supply Oversupply Podcast Episodes Preparing To Breastfeed Pumping Recipes Self Care Sleep Successful Breastfeeding Stories Supplementing Support Tips! Weaning Working And Breastfeeding This website uses marketing and tracking technologies. Opting out of this will opt you out of all cookies, except for those needed to run the website. Note that some products may not work as well without tracking cookies. Opt Out of CookiesArchives
November 2020
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