How to Safely Sleep with Your Baby

I bet you've heard that sleeping with your baby is dangerous, that you shouldn't do it. We've all seen the "Back to Sleep" campaign, which says the only safe place for your baby to sleep is flat on their back, in a crib. And you know what? For many, this is actually true, HOWEVER, it can be safe to sleep next to your baby if you follow ALL of the rules.......

New here? Thanks for stopping by. Please check out some of our other awesome posts, and grab a freebie while you're at it!
How to Use Paced Bottle Feeding with Your Baby
Back to Work Survival Hacks
Lazy Banana Lactation Muffins
Ghost Bed Mattress Review for Bedsharing

Co-sleep is an umbrella term for many forms of sleeping with your baby. Things that fall under co-sleep are, but are not limited to:

• Having baby sleep anywhere in the room with you on a separate sleep surface, like a crib.
• Having baby sleep next to your bed in a crib, or cradle.
• Using a bed side car to have baby within arm’s reach and physically attached to your bed, while not actually in your bed.
• Having baby sleep in a separate basket which is placed in your bed.
• Having baby sleep in your bed with you

There are numerous advantages to co-sleeping with your baby, and it’s very beneficial when you’re breastfeeding. However, not all forms of co-sleeping are safe for everyone. 

Despite what many people believe bedsharing, under the right conditions, can be SAFE. It is considered safe for non-smoking, breastfeeding mothers who are not obese to bedshare. How is bedsharing safe? Well, first let's go over a few myths involved in this subject. 

Myth #1: Your baby will die of SIDS
First of all, SIDS and suffocation are two completely different demons. Secondly, your baby is actually significantly less at risk of SIDS if bedsharing, or any form of co-sleeping is practiced. Babies greatly benefit from hearing their mother’s rhythmic heartbeat and breathing throughout the night. Newborns are not unconscious breathers like we are. They need to think about it. Hearing you breath is a reminder, and also sets a pace for them. 

Myth #2: You will roll over onto and crush your baby.
You will be surprised how well aware of your child you will be! It is completely natural for a breastfeeding mother to create a protective curl around their infant while they sleep, keeping them close to their body. Any time that baby stirs or makes a sound you will be in tune to them and wake. Many mothers find themselves actually waking just before their baby, only to then realize their baby was ready to nurse. Talk about hormonal chemistry! Obviously, there is an exception to this rule. If you are under the influence of over the counter or prescription drugs which may make you drowsy, DO NOT SLEEP WITH BABY. If you are under the influence of illicit drugs, alcohol, or are sleep deprived, DO NOT SLEEP WITH YOUR BABY. It should also be noted that ONLY the exclusively breastfeeding mother should sleep with her baby- not the father or anyone else.

Myth #3: You will never sleep again!
On the contrary. I sleep far better with my baby next to me in my bed than I ever have with him even at arm’s reach away from me, and so does he. I have peace of mind knowing that I can just open my eyes and not need to get up to check on him. Night nursing is a breeze too. I don’t even have to wake up to nurse him. I wear an easy access shirt and keep one breast exposed and he pops on and off as he pleases while I sleep! Research also supports this.

Myth #4: You will never get the baby out of your bed.
Fostering a secure independence begins with a healthy dependence. Part of this includes sleeping with or near your baby. Even the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends co-sleeping for the first year of life. During the first few months, especially, having your baby in your bed will only help you all get more sleep. Newborns are also not designed to sleep alone, and when they are a bit older, and ready to sleep on their own, it will be much easier to do so when they are not nursing frequently through the night. 

Myth #5: Bedsharing will destroy your sex life.
Have you seen the internet meme floating around that reads, “Co-sleepers do it in the kitchen!”? Well, it's true. Or in the bathroom, shower, on the couch, down the hall, etc. You get creative. I personally would resent being in a relationship where sex strictly had to take place in the bedroom or on a bed. How boring, right?

Now that we have gone over some myths, let's go over some do’s and don’ts of bedsharing. 

The Do’s of Bedsharing:

1. Exclusively Breastfeed. Unfortunately this means that if you are only partially breastfeeding, or not breastfeeding you should not sleep with your baby.
2. Use just one pillow, behind your head. Remove excess pillows- or anything excess in your bed.
3. Use one light blanket. (I prefer crocheted blankets, since they are breathable).
4. Place mattress on the floor away from walls, or make sure bed is tightly against the wall with absolutely no gaps for baby to get trapped in.
5. Sleep on a firm mattress, not a quilted pillow top. *ahem, GhostBed, ahem*
6. Place baby on his back to sleep.
7. Tie up long hair that could get into baby’s face.
8. Wear clothing that fits your body.
9. Dress a newborn baby in weather appropriate pajamas, or sleep blanket.

The Don’ts of Bedsharing:

1. Do Not bedshare if you or your partner are a smoker.  Even if you don’t smoke in the house. Smoke lingers on clothes, on your skin and in your hair. Your baby will inhale the secondhand smoke which will affect their lungs and breathing. It is not safe. However, having baby sleep in the room with you on a separate sleep surface is still beneficial for them, provided you do not smoke in the bedroom.
2. Do Not consume alcohol or drugs before sleeping with your baby. Most bedsharing deaths are results of parents under the influence of alcohol or drugs.
3. Do Not sleep with your baby if you have taken a medication, like cold medicine, that could make you drowsy! This is on the exact same lines as alcohol and drugs.
4. Do Not sleep with your baby if you are obese. Being overweight can affect your breathing, and may also indent your mattress, even a firm one like the GohstBed. If your mattress sags and your baby turns into you when you lay down next to them it is not safe to have them sleep with you.
5. Do Not sleep with your baby on a couch or in a recliner. Many mothers will get out of the relative safety of their bed and nurse their baby in a seemingly safer place like a rocker or recliner. Sadly, many infants have suffocated as a result of a parent falling asleep with their infant in their arms in these situations. These types of deaths are classified as co-sleeping deaths. It is unfortunately common, and it skews statistics for bedsharing and makes bedsharing seem like the unsafe option, when that is not the reality.
6. Do Not leave objects on the floor in the area surrounding your bed. You do not want your baby to roll off your bed and onto the floor on top of an object that could injure them.
7. Do Not sleep with baby if you have sleep apnea, or are a naturally heavy sleeper.
8. Do Not allow toddlers or children to sleep in the same bed as a baby who is younger than one year old.

Mothers have been bedsharing for thousands of years, all over the world. It is an instinctive, primitive parenting technique. I hope someday the negative perception of bedsharing will change and it will be socially normal and accepted. The links provided are a few of my sources, though most all of this information I have committed to memory. Happy and safe Bedsharing everyone!
​
http://cosleeping.nd.edu/
https://www.llli.org/faq/cosleep.html
http://kellymom.com/parenting/nighttime/familybed/
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/sleep-problems/scientific-benefits-co-sleeping